Category: Love

Why Is It?

tlc4womenLeave a comment

Walking into the mortuary for my godfather’s funeral, the place is filling quickly. My mom is number 10 of 12 kids so I have cousins everywhere in this room. I have cousin’s spouses everywhere and their grown children and their spouses. I have aunts and uncles and their cousins and so forth. It’s great to have such a great family.

We love each other and come together for times like this. There was a time when we were all small children and family get-togethers were quite common. The more we grew and moved and spread out the less frequent they become. We all hug, we all cry, we all laugh together.

My cousin Celia explains to my husband, “you have to understand, we were like this growing up”, as she sticks her fingers together, “and no matter how long it is between our visits we have always been like this”. It’s true. We were raised like one big family. It was not a big deal to be scolded or loved by any of my mom’s siblings. As Anthony, my son, walks into the room, I see the pattern repeating, I see Celia’s eyes light up as if she’s seeing her son, and she runs and hugs him, “You look good! I’m glad you’re here. Introduce me to your girlfriend, is she the ONE?” Anthony is enveloped in love as everyone comes to greet him and love on him and Frances.

My cousin Danny, who is a year older than I am, explains that he is my favorite cousin to which Celia says matter-of-factly, “No you aren’t our favorite”, and I reply “in fact, you were more like the cousin we never wanted because you were a boy and we all know that you have cooties”. It was an on-going argument of those of us in that age range because we were made to play together as children and the boys were always such a pain except when we needed them to build something for us.

Why is it that we only get together for major events? I have such a great family yet we are so busy that we rarely take the time out of our lives to call each other. Yet in happy times and times of deep sadness family is so important. I pray you take a few minutes today to call one of your loved ones just because!

Happy Thanksgiving!

tlc4women1 Comment

Today I just have a few random thoughts:

I am grateful for the scene I saw yesterday in the store. Loved it actually! I was wheeling my cart out the door after the check-out. It was a madhouse at the store. A little boy about 7ish, was walking with a bag of groceries and his father, who was this boy’s older twin by the way, grabs him by the hood of his coat and says, “Son, wait.” The boy asks why and begins looking at me. The father says, “Men always let women go out ahead of them. If the door isn’t automatic, they open it.” The boy goes, “Why?” I smiled at the dad and said “Thank you”. I am sure the conversation continued. I am grateful that there are still men who are teaching their boys manners. It makes me smile!

I am grateful for Pastor Juan Hernandez’ family because his grandchildren are singing praises to their God and a legacy continues.

I am grateful for this scripture because I can make myself at home in His presence and that is the greatest gift I’ve been given and the thing that blesses me so!

Psalm 100:1 On your feet now – applaud God! 2 Bring a gift of laughter, sing yourselves into his presence. 3 Know this: God is God, and God, God. He made us; we didn’t make him. We’re his people, his well-tended sheep. 4 Enter with the password: “Thank you!” Make yourselves at home, talking praise. Thank him. Worship him. 5 For God is sheer beauty, all-generous in love, loyal always and ever.

Happy Thanksgiving!

The Woman Who Is My Daughter

tlc4women2 Comments
Last year just before Casey's birthday!

Today Casey is 25. I remember well the day she was born. Casey was born social with a great imagination and lots of strong will. As a toddler she pranced around in her tutu and when she started kindgergarten she was convinced she was allergic to pants and so she wore dresses all the time. She was a joy to raise and even though she challenged me with her opinion, we did a great job of getting along and working together.

Apples don’t fall far from trees and I see myself in her. Independent, loving, and driven she has set out into the world to make a place for herself. A place of her own ideals on her own terms. You can bet that she is never motivated by peer pressure, all of her successes and failures have been of her own choices. I learned early with a strong-willed child you have to find a way to channel it in boundaries but you never want to take it away. Strong will will serve its purpose one day and it has. Instead of a five year college plan she finished in 3 1/2 while working, proving that whatever she sets her mind to do she accomplishes it.

When I close my eyes and see my daughter I remember her as a four year-old, dancing and playing and singing. Hers was a world of make believe.

I know you I walked with you once upon a dream
I know you the gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam
And I know it’s true that visions are seldom all they seem
But if I know you I know what you’ll do
You’ll love me at once the way you did once upon a dream

I worry about her, I pray for her and the word love doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel about her. I miss her terribly most days. We won’t see each other today, as we are miles apart, but my love follows her always and distance is never an obstacle. I love you sweet child ‘o mine!

TLC’s Conference

tlc4womenLeave a comment

We were honored to have such powerful conference this weekend. Almost 150 women gathered to discuss why God asks us not to arouse or awaken love before it so desires. Women from the ages of 10-100 came and learned what God’s plan was and why he said wait. I was so impressed by our teens who were honestly saying that they had never really considered why God said wait.

Some of the comments that touched my heart were:

“Now I understand why my dad acts like he hates boys to talk to me you know? He is trying to protect me. I mean, he’s still not doing it right but I see his heart now you know?”

“I would never do the things I do in front of my dad but I had never considered that my father in heaven is always watching. It makes you think.”


“I can’t talk to my mom because she always runs and tells her sisters and her friends.”

“I can’t talk to my mom because she always starts yelling and judging.”

“I feel helpless when my daughter comes to me because I see my baby asking 13 year-old questions and it scares me.”

“I sometimes don’t know what to say to my daughter so I revert to rules.”

“I still wear scars by the things boys said to me in high school”

“I didn’t live what I am teaching and I want more for my daughter but I don’t know what to say.”

“I’m scared of what I see happening to the young girls today.”

“My mom just lectures and I have no one to talk to but my friends.”

Thank you Jesus for a ministry that allows us to come forth with the questions of our heart. Thank you that you see every question and that it is meaningful to you!

How Much Do We Love The Church

tlc4women2 Comments
kereweddingdress.blogspot.com

In his book, Forgotten God, Francis Chan asks the question, how much do you love the church?

I read this with interest and thought about some things that are really disturbing to me. Recently, my son was called a bible thumper in youth group. It made me laugh, although my son was angry about it, but it was a funny statement coming from within the church. I laughed because it’s true! He is a bible thumper and his questions and study make me smile.

We read the bible at our house and we discuss it and we teach it and we try very hard to live it. Although, yeah, with teenagers we sometimes find ourselves defending and explaining ideals that they often find old-fashioned to our culture today. What was meant as a put-down wasn’t in my eyes because it’s our job to teach the bible to our kids. We love the church that much! Not even because we are pastors either. We loved the church before we were in ministry. We are friends of the groom, called to serve his bride and prepare her for a wedding. This is why I love the picture above so much. The people in the picture are caring for every detail of the bride in preparation!

What happens though when the church doesn’t know she’s getting married? I have a friend who is faithful to her church attendance. Her children are in Sunday School each Sunday. Get beyond the basics of Sunday School and her kids know nothing really about the word of God. They can’t pray cognitively for a meal or for themselves or others. Should not love for the church begin at home? I spoke to this issue with her. What I realized was to raise a bible thumper you really have to believe the bible. You have to know it, you have to read it. A thousand sermons at your left hand and ten thousand at your right, makes you no more an effective witness if you don’t know your word. How can your family stand against the trials of the world if they do not know the word or who the bride is beyond a mere acquaintance? So what is the fruit of our testimony? Is it not in part our children and our life? Does it matter that the people who I call friends and co-workers come to ask me to pray for them but my kids live like hell? How much do I love the church? It shows first in my life. No not one of us is perfect nor do any of us have the perfect family, I certainly don’t. I want to try to do better. I want to love the church so much that television or tiredness or overwork doesn’t cause me to forsake my family. I don’t want to depend on the little songs from childhood Sunday School to get my kids through. I want to be active and engaged in their education. I want them to know that I love God not just with my lips but with my action and my advancement of the kingdom in their lives. I ask what my kids are reading in their bibles, and no it’s not the only thing they read. We discuss viewpoints and my bible thumper has some deep thoughts that you’d never know about unless you ask. Bible study is not just for the pastor’s kids, it’s for everyone who loves the church.

For His Pleasure

tlc4women2 Comments
cadillac nav system

Revelation 4:11 Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honour and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created.

We were created for God’s pleasure. The word pleasure in the Greek is Thelema and its definition is:
what one wishes or has determined shall be done
of the purpose of God to bless mankind through Christ
of what God wishes to be done by us
commands, precepts will, choice, inclination, desire, pleasure

It was God’s choice to create us and His desire. In these days of tough economic times and with all the things going on in the world, it’s sometimes hard for someone to understand what God really had in mind. It would seem as if we were created for his pleasure that he would take no pleasure in our suffering. He doesn’t take any pleasure in it at all.

When I was growing up, I thought God was just sitting on a throne of judgment with a scowl on his face ready to render judgment and cast my soul to hell. This is why I have such a problem with parents who tell their kids that, “God’s gonna get you”! Not that my parents did that, but my religion did. They meant well, it kept us on a specific track but it wasn’t biblical. 

So while we find ourselves in uncertain times and we look to heaven and wonder why God allowed this, the answer is He didn’t. There is a little thing called Free Will that gives us the ability to change the track of where we are supposed to go. When God is in control of our lives, he directs where we are going. Often we ignore his direction.

My husband has a love/hate relationship with Navigation System in our car. He takes the time to punch in the address and then argues with directions. Halfway through the trip he is changing course and direction and is in a battle with the Navigation System as to the best way to get there.

We were created for his pleasure. He takes delight in our well doing but just as any parent, he isn’t so pleased with our errors. I have two adult children and I want everything to be perfect for them but sometimes they make decisions without wise counsel and that sends them on a path that I would have never chosen for them. Yet, they are adults who live in their own homes and I must abide by their decisions whether I agree with them or not.

It is the same with God. In order to establish a kingdom on earth. He then put a king on earth, Adam, and eventually you and I. He had to then allow us to make decisions that shaped and influenced our kingdom. God’s hope and his pleasure was that we’d counsel up. Imagine the feeling that God must have when our prayers come up not for the messes we find ourselves in but for counsel for the things we are thinking about doing?

Just like the Navigation System where we punch in the address, then we change course and question routes, we find ourselves driving in wrong directions or taking a long scenic tour instead of the course originally set. When people say things like, “If God is so good why are there people suffering on the planet?” We need only to point the finger at the masters of that planet, you and I. If we could learn to live for His pleasure we’d find a lot of answers to the world’s problems and eradicate much of the suffering. Maybe this year, we’ll get a little closer to what’s important.

What Happened?

tlc4womenLeave a comment

This year our church participated in a Harvest Festival with 11 other churches in our city. We met in the town square and set up booths of games and food on Halloween Night. As is usually the case, the questions arose.

Should we celebrate Halloween?

Aren’t we supposed to stay home on that night?

Why are glorifying the devil?

Naturally we answered all the questions. Who created the day? God! So if He created the day then why would we dedicate the day to the devil? We accept the word,

Psalm 118:24 This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

This post really isn’t about all of this per se. This post is about something that’s really been stirring in my soul. I am wondering how we call ourselves the army of God and then we go and hide on a day that someone deemed the devil’s day.

In any war there are two generals. They count the cost of the battle and determine whether they can win or not. I guess in this case we failed to listen to the general’s orders and we went home in defeat. I wonder if we understand our dominion mandate and what that really means? By stepping out on a night that is supposed to be evil and participate in a town square event in the middle of our city, I believe we took back the night. When we played a game where the children who attended, were given a marshmallow and a sling shot and told that they had to slay Goliath, many asked us the story. We told about great King David and a lot of kids didn’t know the bible story at all. By loving some kids enough to plant a seed into their souls, giving them a snack and teaching them a bible story, we took Sunday School to the streets. We were taking dominion.

Even that, isn’t the point of this post. The point is, knowing the bible the way we do, what made some turn and run in fear? We became like Elijah after a big victory, turning and running from Jezebel. Maybe it’s exhaustion, maybe it’s a self-esteem issue, maybe it’s because we don’t understand our power and our Father’s power, or because we thought were alone. Whatever it is, there are many who haven’t bowed to Halloween and are ready and waiting to gather together and take back the night.

When Sin Becomes Normal

tlc4women1 Comment

My husband was dropping off some paperwork at a believer’s house. The woman invited him in and this being her new home she proceeded to show him around the new place. She even showed him the bedroom she sleeps in with the man she is not married to. I guess when sin becomes normal there is no need for pretending even with the man you call Pastor.  

What is it that shuts down our reactions to right and wrong? When a person who doesn’t have a personal relationship with Christ does the same thing we excuse it as ignorance but is this the same answer for a believer? 

Could it be that a believer may have walked away from their relationship with Christ so that the still small voice has gotten quiet and since we no longer hear it we take it as approval? Could it be that the world’s call to do what everyone else is doing has just become too enticing to not take advantage? These are the questions stirring around in my heart as I write. I want to learn from this. For you see, I was many things in my youth, many worldly things, but now that I have come before the throne of grace and love and surrendered my life, my desire is to learn. My desire is to want what is best for me and to never stop hearing the prompting of the Holy Spirit. 

Recently, my friend came over my house. I heard myself spilling out about two dreams I’ve had about someone and how I was worried about them. Only afterward, did I think it was gossip. This conversation was not about my friend nor about me. At first, I excused it for the reality it was. I wanted to talk about my feelings with someone that I knew I could trust. Then, I had to come clean and repent. It doesn’t matter what I want, it doesn’t matter that the Lord has put this person on my heart, it doesn’t matter that I don’t have someone in the physical realm to talk to about it, it matters that I do the right thing. I never want to become so dulled that I don’t recognize when I blow it. 

In order to keep that up though it must become routine and habit that I go to the Lord for sustenance and examination. In the same way that I go to the kitchen to get something to eat when I am hungry, and then choose what is good for food, I must go to the Lord to feed my soul. I’ve got to exercise my faith that when I am feeling alone with too many responsibilities and no one to share them with that God will be my confidant and He will direct my path. I’ve got to remind myself of the scripture that comes to mind and not give in to what people say is normal. I must choose a different path. 

Therein lies the answer of when sin becomes normal. It becomes normal when I reject the teaching I’ve had, and the teacher Himself, and I succumb to what I want rather than what is best for me.

Thank God

I am not going to wait until the journey gets easier or the challenges are removed; I am thanking you right now.

tlc4women1 Comment

I received this in an email, thanks Cynthia, and thought it was worth repeating:

DEAR GOD:

I want to thank You for what you have already done.

I am not going to wait until I see results or receive rewards; I am thanking you right now.

I am not going to wait until I feel better or things look better; I am thanking you right now.

I am not going to wait until people say they are sorry or until they stop talking about me; I am thanking you right now.

I am not going to wait until the pain in my body disappears; I am thanking you right now.

I am not going to wait until my financial situation improves; I am going to thank you right now.

I am not going to wait until the children are asleep and the house is quiet; I am going to thank you right now.

I am not going to wait until I get promoted at work or until I get the job; I am going to thank you right now.

I am not going to wait until I understand every experience in my life that has caused me pain or grief; I am thanking you right now.

I am not going to wait until the journey gets easier or the challenges are removed; I am thanking you right now.

I am thanking you because I am alive. I am thanking you because I made it through the day’s difficulties. I am thanking you because I have walked around the obstacles.I am thanking you because I have the ability and the opportunity to do more and do better. I’m thanking you because FATHER, YOU haven’t given up on me.

God is just so good, and he’s good all the time.

Good and Evil

tlc4womenLeave a comment
www.flickr.com/
http://www.flickr.com/

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

We learned yesterday that everything that happens is for a reason and that reason will have a good outcome for us in some way. If that is so then what is truly bad? If even bad things can turn out good then good and evil become subjective until we understand the whole story. We all carry battle wounds and scars that tell a sad story. The scar shows we got through the wound or ordeal and we have proof that things heal and get better. Moreover, if we truly trust who He says He is we come out strengthened in our faith. Therein lies the problem; trusting God that He has our best interest at hand. Especially when we’ve had to endure a struggle.

Disobedience can kill all the good in our life in an instant. There is a cost to being free will human beings and I wonder if we often count the cost of that before we set out to do a thing? We learned in day one of this teaching that when Adam and Eve sacrificed their self for the self image they distanced themselves from the reach of the Father. Not that He couldn’t reach them but that He honors our choices. They now could honestly say they had knowledge of good, the time with God, and evil the time when they determined to take matters into their own hands and edge God out. Disobedience, defiance, or an act outside of love removes the presence of good in our life and we delve head first into the dark, bad places of where life can take us. In this condition we become like hardened clay unable to mold into any possibility of hope. In this condition we find all sorts of evil that ultimately proves to destroy our soul. This is where victim thinking comes in, this is where despair comes in, this is where we meet depression, despondency, despair. This is the place where hope is lost.

You see, outside of the boundaries of God we live an unprotected life. Yet, I believe that all of us truly know that this sort of lifestyle feels good to the flesh for awhile. We’ve all put our toe in the water of evil and felt the warmth of the water there as it invited us in. Some of us dove straight in and swam around for a time, while others of us cautiously took the steps one by one. Either way we have knowledge of what it feels like. Only, it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. We noticed that we were swimming around with hungry sharks that were taking us apart piece by piece. Some of us still don’t see the chunks missing and we continue on. Some of us choose to ignore the fact that we are being devoured and pretend as if all is well.

In this place of darkness we begin to live in fear. When conviction comes we question whether the others swimming with us will still like us? We begin to feel entitled to live in debauchery and we call it our right. We relish the power of living our lives our way and we take free will to a level it was never intended to go. Then when the bottom falls out and we no longer have any options left, we ask God why he allowed us to go so far? Why has He betrayed us?

It becomes a matter of trusting that God is really good because we’ve seen so much evil we can’t conceive that there is One who is trustworthy. Besides, it is much easier to blame someone else for our own choices.

Matthew 18:3. And he said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.