We all know that person, it’s not any of us reading this today, but we all have that friend……yeah, that’s it, that friend who is addicted to chaos. They aren’t happy unless there is drama. If you ask them how they are, you had better be prepared for the dramatic answer. They are always fighting with their boyfriend because if there isn’t the fear of breaking up at any moment, well then it’s just boring and that boredom may be the thing to break them up. If they aren’t fighting with their spouse and can’t take another minute in their marriage, then life would not be worth living. Only they’ve been telling you that for 10 years now. If they weren’t in turmoil at work, then they wouldn’t be worthy of a paycheck. If they weren’t gossiping about a friend, then they would have nothing to talk about. They fight with their parents, their friends, their boyfriends or husbands, their co-workers, their children and any other relationship you can think of because, if there isn’t constant chaos then there is no reason for life. They live in constant stress and pressure but this is where they get their kicks. See, just as we get addicted to coffee, cigarettes, alcohol, food, video games, gambling or whatever we can get addicted to the feeling of chaos. Chaos causes its own sensation of turmoil and worry. If a person addicted to chaos can’t find any in their own life, they’ll produce it. A person addicted to chaos, likes to see things turned up on edge, they get high off that feeling of living on that edge of emotional danger. They SAY they want PEACE but they don’t work towards it, they only work towards stirring the pot. They like for things to be stressful, they feed on that stress like a junkie.Peace makes them nervous.
Peace in your life is a simple way to live. It doesn’t bring all the drama and effect but it’s an easy, more creative way to live. To look at things simply and take moments to breathe is healthy. Doug and I started out our marriage with anything but peace. If I told you that for us it was what we imagine hell would be like, it would be a poor description of how we felt. We had a lot to work out but we did it and we’ve enjoyed our life together since. It’s not without it’s arguments, which Doug says are discussions.We now go weeks without miscommunication and we both love and thrive in the peace. For some people the peace we so love would be the hell we felt in the chaos.
Just as with any addiction you have to decide that you no longer want to live like that. Today, I pray that as you read this blog if there are things that are sticking out to you that make you wonder if you are addicted to chaos or if you are a co-dependent of someone who is addicted to chaos that you make a decision to leave this lifestyle behind. That you decide that this does nothing for you and that you can find peace to live a beautiful life without all the drama.
Finding help to deal with the chaos in your life is a very smart idea. Often there are triggers that you can learn to avoid. Don’t put it off. Believe it or not, living peacefully is easier and will increase your clarity and creativity.