People in our church say things like, “Pastor Susan hates feelings.” No, I don’t hate feelings and I’ve never said I hate feelings but I do say things like, “don’t be ruled by your feelings”. There is a great problem in America today with feelings. We allow them to control us and we validate them way too often.
We “feel” therefore we act or react. Feelings sometimes lie. Feelings sometimes betray you and others. Be careful how you handle your feelings. Now, there are those, whose days are up and down like a bouncing ball.
Sarah flies strictly by her feelings, so she wakes up happy and singing but when she can’t match her shoes to her dress her day is ruined. Then, Starbucks makes the perfect Latte and her day is great! She gets to work and her buddy called in sick 😦 so she is bummed. After that, a client needs an answer by noon and she is stressed. Because the answer is taking longer than normal to come, she won’t have time for lunch, this makes her cranky and she snaps at everyone… and, and, and, and you get the picture. Sarah’s emotions are swayed by each and every one of her circumstances.
All of the things that happened in Sarah’s life before noon had her feelings up and down. The problem was she needed to get a grip on herself. Her feelings were changing minute by minute and if she had taken a moment to breath, she could have handled her day more effectively.
You simply can’t let your feelings rule your life. Instead, use them as checks and balances and then compose and get yourself together and determine action if needed. Feelings are important as checks in our lives but to be constantly ruled by them is to live an erratic life. I truly believe that if we learn to control how we react to our feelings we will restore the well being in our lives. If you control your feelings and not allow your feelings to control you, your self-esteem will rise as you get a grip on your life and take charge.
2 thoughts on “Nothing More Than Feelings”
I get a little clinical about “feelings” because circumstances tend to be a bad guage for who I want to be. In the morning things look bright and happy cuz my energy’s up and there’s so much potential, by evening I’m usually exhausted so I feel depleated and down.
If we go according to our needs to guage how we feel at any given time, it means we are not in control of anything we feel but at the whim of time and chance. I prefer to control exactly what I want to be. No, I’m not perfect at it because otherwise I wouldn’t have pointed out my efforts to gain self-control, but I recognize no one has to be ruled by outside forces or even inside ones to determine what they “feel” at any given moment.
I’ve met plenty of disabled people who are some of the happiest I know and by the standards Susan brought up or those we use as a ruler to decide how we should feel about things, these people have it the worst. Yet they move on and live happily anyway. Watching a guy who couldn’t talk clearly but had to use a computer voice to express himself and a motorized wheelchair to move anywhere taught me that my circumstances have nothing to do with how I look at the world.
Paul also says, “Whether well-fed or hungry, in plenty or in want, I rejoice…I am content.”
He had learned the secret to happiness and joy. I am determined to commit myself to this as well.
That’s the key to not being led by your feelings. It’s learning that life happens.
So while yeah, there are days when if I hear about another person’s failure because they weren’t “feeling” to do the right thing, I will scream, I have to realize that’s my feeling and I have to accept that my life changes only when I decide it does.
I want to learn the art of contentment. It is a process that is worth the effort.